We are equal, but only if you are....

Looking at the past history of man I find myself more and more ashamed of who we are. Throughout history we have fought with one another, weaker being enslaved by stronger, more advanced overcoming the less advanced instead of sharing in what they know and have. Just because one culture or country or type of person is different does not make them inferior.
Example: Explorers come across the ocean and discover a “New World”, and thus begins hundreds of years of enslavement, rape, pilfering, and destruction. We come across civilizations and think they are primitive and backwards, think that we are special, because we have God on our side and these people are one step above cavemen. Never mind the fact that many of these societies had reading, writing, large cities, medicine and many other advancements while the European nations were still living in mud huts and were illiterate for the most part. In fact we find ourselves today marveling at the achievements they had in the sciences, architecture, language and medicine. We find that we are discovering all sorts of plants that are helping in medicine only to discover these ”primitives” knew about it hundreds of years ago. The same goes with mathematics, science and astronomy…instead of learning from them we crushed them and set ourselves backwards.
Fast forward…we are now MUCH more civilized and have created a new country. We find that we can plant, harvest and be much more civilized than Europeans. We draw up a document that will be the basis for this new country. In it we state, “We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable rights, that among these are Life, Liberty, and the Pursuit of Happiness.”
However, this did not hold true for all. If you were not white or male you were not afforded these. We touted ourselves as being advanced and freethinkers, above the tyranny that was rampant in Europe. Uh huh, yeah, right…women were considered chattel, could not own property or have a say in financial matters..but we did correct that over the next 100 years.
Even worse than that was the fact that we would travel to Africa, capture, kill, enslave, terrorize an entire nation of people. And why would we do that? Simply for the fact that they had a different level of Melanin in their genetic makeup than we did, and that makes us superior… because God says so. Remember god is white right?!? Let’s stop and take a look at that why don’t we? God as we worship him is Yahweh and Christianity is based on the religious worship of his son. Now please remember at this time the Jewish faith was based out of what is now the Middle East. This region was NOT populated by Caucasians, and in fact the region that Christ is believed to come from that he would actually have been much darker than what is portrayed in many images used by the church. But as is shown throughout history, politics, religion and all that is associated with it, is controlled by the ruling class. So over time the image of God and Christ as become more and more anglicized.
So while we are spouting how everyone should be given the same rights and treated equally, we are enslaving an entire nation and destroying yet another civilization. While the young America was expounding on how they were throwing off the shackles of tyranny, we just took those shackles and threw them on to someone else. While most of Europe was abolishing slavery, as far back as 1500, the new country was setting humans rights back hundreds of years. Yes yes yes I know that we “corrected” that injustice starting in 1861…almost a hundred years after we declared ourselves a country. During this “Civil” war..an oxymoron if I ever heard one..over 600,000 people died. To put this in perspective only 53,000 military personnel died during the Vietnam war. Another fact that most people don’t know is that African Americans fought during the civil war..on both sides. In fact they have fought in every single war that America has been in, yet up to 1964 the country had in effect what was referred to as “Jim Crow” laws. Even the term “Jim Crow” is offensive, taking the name from a song and dance routine called “Jump Jim Crow”, that was performed by a white actor in blackface, named Thomas D. Rice. These laws mandated de jure segregation, supposedly giving a separate but equal status to African Americans. What this did in reality is create separate and unequal rules that remained in effect until 1964. Yet even then the changes took over 40 years and still take place even today. For a country that prides itself on tolerance and equality we have a pretty good history of actually practicing what we do not preach. I’ve argued this many times when my friends and I get into this discussion. I have argued that for a society that preaches tolerance we have a history of slavery and bigotry..hell we have a whole organization that likes to spout ignorant hate, and commit horrible acts against people, all the while wearing white sheets over themselves because they are too cowardly to show their faces. We have a history of females and anyone who is not a white male having to claw, scratch, and fight to be treated with equal rights and to be afforded the most basic of privileges that are freely given to others.
“But things are not as bad as they used to be”, you say. True we have come a long way, but nowadays there is a new type of racism rearing its ugly head. I heard someone comment the other day how great this country is in how it grants freedoms to people, and then not a minute later in their conversation talk about how it is disgusting that California is allowing gays and lesbians marry. All that is, is just a different form of bigotry, nowhere does it say that “All men are created equal unless you are in love with someone of the same gender”. I listen to how all these politicians, individuals, and churches protest this, and push to get laws in place to ban “gay marriage”. I listen to how they want the “don’t ask, don’t tell” to stay in place, and in fact how they believe if you are gay you should not be allowed to serve your country. How horrible crimes and abuses are committed against people who happen to love someone that is the same sex, and how many times people say “it’s a shame” and look the other way and don’t do anything to help or change things. When you ask most of these people what is their big objection with homosexuality…their response is that it is a crime in the eyes of God.
OK this country was founded on the belief of separation of church and state. i.e.: letter from the third president Thomas Jefferson in 1802 to a committee of Baptists in Connecticut. Jefferson referred to the First Amendment of the Constitution of the United Sates as creating a "wall of separation" between church and state. The phrase was quoted by the United States Supreme Court first in 1878, and then in a series of cases starting in 1947.
I am going to break that down for some of you out there that may not get it…until Democracy in America was founded governments of the world were governed typically by “divine right”. Depending on the country that typically meant that the ruler was given that position from God himself or was a direct descendant of whatever divine being that area believed in. We were founded by people trying to escape that tyranny. That is why this separation was determined as being needed so that the government could do the work it needed to do without unjust and unneeded influence from the church. 200 years later though we have too many politicians espousing how God is offended and would not want this law or that law in place…we are forgetting that main belief that this country was based on, and that is, in my opinion, a dangerous area we are going into. Because if we are going to ignore this then we need to remember that America is also called “the Melting Pot”. We have peoples from all countries, races, religions, and belief systems here. So if that is the case and we want to ignore that separation fine, but which god do we need to use, Yahweh, God, Jesus, Buddha, Mohammad, Vishnu, Mother Earth, Satan, etc? We have people in this country that worship all of these and many more, so which one do we need to use in making the laws and guidelines for our country to go on?
Now I know that many of these politicians spout scripture stating, “god says this, god says that”. Fine, but take any small snippet of any writing and it can be twisted into almost any meaning you want. Here’s an example “See Jane run. Run Jane run.” Now let me make a slight change and edit “Run Jane! Run!”. I have taken a well known reading primer sentence and have now changed it in to apparently a situation where Spot has gone rabid and Jane’s life is in mortal danger. This is how many laypeople in today’s society use the scriptures. They take a small snippet and use it without looking at the whole picture. Most people don’t even realize that the bible that is used today is not the same as what was originally written. The church has over the centuries deleted this or changed that, removed whole gospels, there were not only four written , in fact there were dozens. But the early Catholic church did not think they all mattered and in fact the early church actually took the gospels it agreed with most and only used them. Not to mention that as the centuries went by language itself changes. For example the word “Man” originally meant a person, then later came to mean a male, while the word “wif” came about meaning woman in Old English and came of course later to be the word “wife”. In fact males were referred to as "wer", the word "man" meaning mankind. So when you read the word “man” in the bible there is a very good likelihood that at one time it meant man as a whole not man as only male.
So when you listen to representatives of our government spouting what God says and what the Bile says we should be doing, when it comes to what the government should be doing remember those points. Remember that the scriptures we have today are not the same from when they were first written. Remember that we are built on the belief in a separation of church and state. Remember that this country is built on diversity, this country is made for everyone no matter if they are straight, gay, male, female, Christian, Muslim, Hindu, Pagan, or whatever. We are all created equal..not created equal only if (insert ignorant bigoted belief here). It is time that people think, people educate themselves, and that people act. Remember you do not have to do any of this, but don't complain when you realize your rights have been decided for you and YOU are that next group that is now not equal to your fellow humans.

Religion in the South

I look at things today when it comes to religion and I wonder what happened. I try and teach my son the difference of right and wrong, to learn that he needs to speak up when he does not think something is just or is unfair. I see things like this "Dove" church in Florida and I am ashamed. I listen to this man who should be preaching about tolerance and fairness (I seem to remember one of the Christian tenets being "turn the other cheek"), instead he is spewing the most ignorant, foul, slurs and racist trash I have heard in years. This man is planning on commemorating the anniversary of 9/11 by burning Korans. Stating that this is due to the Muslim faith causing more wars than any other religion in history. I don't know...I was raised Catholic and I know my history pretty well. I think the Christians of all sects can give them a run for their money, if its from the crusades, Ireland, to manifest destiny and the plight of the native Americans. This act has been admonished by Jewish leaders, Muslim leaders, and even the Pope. Even Gen. Peterus has asked that this not be done as it will more than likely cause a horrid backlash, endangering our troops serving in the middle east, which in turn may endanger innocents as well if the past history of bombings takes place. This preacher, this "man of God", and I use this term loosely has stated that he will continue on with this no matter what. He states that this is to stand up against "evil", he stated the Koran is evil because it is not in the Bible. Well by that reasoning so is almost any religious text, any book in the library from "Tale of Two Cities" to "Everybody Poops". Hell, while we are at it lets just go ahead and start burning those, and any other book that does not fit into our neat, tidy, ignorant, space. Lest just start throwing music and art in that too..what a marvellously new concept. Oh wait...this was done before...think you may have heard about it...movement in the forties..he hated another religious group too..blamed them for everything too..what was his name...oh yeah..ADOLPH HITLER.
What we have here is a sad little man that wants to grab his time in the spotlight, even if doing this may cause death to others who have nothing to do with it. And yes I know he has every right under the first amendment, but seems to me using it to cause uproar and panic, and harm is not what was envisioned to be used as. The first amendment is a weapon, and like any weapon it can be used for good or bad. It can be thought of as say a knife, in the hands of a master chef or a skilled surgeon a knife can create and heal, or in the hands of Jack the ripper...well we all know what happened there. Basically what it comes down to we need to tell our news stations and news outlets, do NOT cover this insane man, do not give him airtime. This is what he wants, ignore him and maybe he will go away...don't and people like that eat it up and will try to come up with something more shocking, more hurtful, more outrageous. I hear people saying how horrible it is, well I heard one person say the smartest thing about this. If she hears or sees a story about this man and his idiocy, she turns it off.
Good for her, good for us if we do it too.
This type of hate is what is causing the schisms in churches today. Hearing supposed men of God preach bigotry and hate against, gays and lesbians, Muslims, Jews, protestants,baptists, catholics, black, white, Asian, middle eastern, etc, etc, etc. This is why me, as person raised in a very Catholic household, baptisms, first communions, confirmations, etc, were all big deals in my family, but I turned my back and walked away from my Church that was a huge part of my life. This is also why I have not baptised my son, who is now 13, and does not attend church either and a very limited knowledge of who Jesus Christ is. I try to teach the best i can as to what is right, what is wrong, and then when he is old enough he can make that decision for himself. and if chooses Christianity, fine, if he wants to become Jewish, Muslim, Hindu, Buddhist, Wiccan, Pagan, or worship a giant polka dotted Velociraptor that is his decision and I will stand behind him because I love him. AND THAT IS WHAT RELIGION IS ABOUT UNABASHED, UNEQUIVOCAL, UNASKING LOVE.

Blame Game

I drove to work today like any other, today I was listening to the news on NPR. Some days I listen to music some days not, today though was the fateful. Today I listened to the story of a murder trial in Tennessee, this is the breakdown: The defendant murdered his wife after he had been drinking..the crime was horrific, so bad that veteran police officers and the d.a. made comment that in all their years they had never seen so much blood and violence at a scene. The defendant, Bradley Waldroup, had been drinking and got upset when his wife stated that she was going to go out with a friend. At this point he told his children to say good-bye to their mother and (at this point I will save you the grisly details) killed his wife's friend and attempted to kill her. The District Attorney went after what he thought was an open and shut case, they had all the evidence, they had the perp, he confessed, and never reneged on that confession. Here is where it gets convoluted. The defense attorney brings in experts that show that Waldroup suffers from the bad "Warrior" gene, MAO-A. This is a gene that is believed to cause explosive and violent outburst in males. They argued that he was not liable because as he had been drinking and suffered from this MAO-A imbalance he was not able to control his actions, arguing that due this imbalance and his upbringing that his chances for this type of violence was increased by 400 times. Needless to say the jury came back and found him guilty---of voluntary manslaughter, and attempted second degree murder, not the first degree murder the d.a. was going for. What does this mean? Instead of the possibility of life in prison or the death penalty he received 32 years (which with parole will be less if granted). The judge did tell Waldroup to think twice about appeals because if this went back to court that there would be a good chance that another jury may come back with something much worse.


Why am I writing about this? Because of what I call the blame game. No one likes to take blame for their actions. Don't admit you did it, it's not your fault, my parent's were mean, I didn't get a pony...blah blah blah. Things like this case will open a floodgate...kill someone because you were stoned or drunk and hit them with your car..it's not your fault because you have a genetic predisposition for substance abuse and should not be held responsible. Set the place on fire and burn down your apartment building...not your fault they should have known to make sure in your entire life you never got your hands on anything that creates flame since your great-great-great-great-great grandfather was an arsonist for the Bolsheviks. I am so tired of hearing this. Tired of the celebrities excusing their larcenous behavior by making a public apology and saying they will go to the latest outpatient rehab center with a revolving door and mini bar. Grow up, suck it up, and take responsibility for your actions. Get sober and do what you're supposed to.


When I was growing up I was always told by my dad to admit when I did something wrong. do something wrong and then you better expect to accept the consequences. I will admit right here and now...I am not perfect..far from it. I get mad, I lose my temper with my son, with my family members, with my friends...just like anyone else in this world. Newsflash folks: Mary Poppins is fictional...spoonful of sugar just gives you cavities, and you will have bad days.


People are going to say why am I being so hard on these celebs that apologize and go in for this rehab or that treatment center. OK here it is ..going to lay it all out..they go, they get clean to show up in front of the judge, act all penitent and then go out and celebrate with a 3 week binge of booze, drugs and anything else to make their "hard lives" temporarily better. Now let me tell you about me..I am 41...been to rehab twice, been working hard for the last 21 years to be clean.... And it is not easy...I've lost friends, I've stumbled, I've hurt people...but I live my life and I realize that tomorrow I will have to face these people. So I keep my demons in check I do what I need to. I have not been perfect all these years but I take it one day by one day by one day, I make mistakes, but I admit to them and I stay sober. But not once have I said oh well I have the gene that makes it easier for me to be addicted and say oh well, no need to try and just give in. I could do that, but if I do I'm dead. I could go out and hurt people and say it's not my fault and blame someone.


It is for this same reason that even with the problems Grayson has I still want him to go back and apologize or make it right when he does something wrong. I refuse to let my son grow up thinking that it is ok to let someone else take the blame if he makes a mistake. I know this may sound harsh to some people but I do this because I care for and love my son. If i didn't then I would let him do what he wants regardless of the consequences. One day he will understand this and hopefully he will love me for it, just like I understand where my dad was coming from and that he loved me. He never gave up on me when I was using and because of his and my mom's help I got clean. Maybe if our society spent a little more time being responsible and play a lot less of the Blame Game things could be just a little better.

A Death 20 years in the making

Throughout our life we meet people, some people are are good, some people are bad...no matter what they affect us. I met someone over 20 years ago and he became a very close friend. Every night we drove into the DFW area where we knew someone who had bought some old storefront spaces and converted it into a punk bar..Three bucks and B.Y.O.B and we had a blast and once the cops realised we weren't going to tear things up they left us alone. The bands would play..Lickity Split, Cro-mags, Toadies. We spent more time moshing up and down the floor, round and round, whirling fists, leather jackets, spikes, but no one got hurt..very few times did fights break out and they were settled quickly and the fun started up again. And I was usually in the middle of it I was little for my age but I had a knack for picking a fight..I won more that I lost. But that is not this story......during all of this there was a great guy who was a close friend he pulled my butt out of the fire more often than not and saved me from making bad mistakes. We freaking did everything together. He got married and had a great kid ..problem was he was an addict..Tony and I partied alllll the time..I got him started. Problem with that I eventually got myself pulled together..I moved away, saw him only here and there over the next 20 years, he lost everything, job, family, son barely knows who he was. Little over a year I got a call from him telling me he was sorry, and that was the last I heard for a couple of days. I got a letter later, this was the last I would hear from him. Tony violated his parole and was going to be a third strike, he chose to not go back in. By the time I got the letter Tony was dead, he decided that an OD'd do it..I just hope it was painless. I remember him to this day, he grew up around hunters, he knew guns in and out, but never used them to do bad things, he drew like no one I ever knew. He drew his wife the most gorgeous portrait in Black and white that looked like it could step off the page and dance, he had a wicked sense of humor...I actually saw him get a nun to laugh until she had tears running down her face once. I saw him give a vagrant who was covered with newspapers his flannel shirt and tshirt under that and slip the guy a 20.00. I also saw him after weeks of shooting up, shaking, vomiting, delusional and begging for a hit. ..eventually I had to get away from it for my health and sanity. And he never forgot that in his letter he left he reminded me how it was my fault...I ruined him...and I left him when I had enough...I got my life together and he was left in the void...he hated me, he disowned me, said my name would never cross his lips ever again.
They didn't, he was dead hours after that. I blamed myself, I cried, I hurt, I felt worthless, this was over a year ago...it still hurts, you feel the regret. That little voice...could I have done more? could I have tried harder? maybe I could have but nothing would have changed, he would still be dead and I would still miss him horribly.
I am reminded of this quote "Accept life, and you must accept regret."-Henri Frederic Amiel.
So I accept this life and I accept the regret, the tears, the pain...and I learn.
I miss you Tony and I am sorry for you, I hope it is better now.

My Father

On the eve of my birthday I started considering something. People celebrate you coming into the world , but you know the celebration should be for the parents who brought you in to this world. There are numerous situations where children grown up, with or without parents, good houses, bad houses, nurturing, non-nurturing. Me I was lucky I grew up in a house with two loving parents. They were smart, caring, nosy (as any good parent should ), and wiser than I gave them credit for. My mother was a rock..dealing with four boys and the nonsense that goes with that...those of you who question this have never seen the apocalyptic mess they can create. She was Referee, Cook, Teacher, Caregiver, and Nurse. and I know we all loved her for it. But I am going to write more about her later..here I want to write about:
DAD--He is amazingly smart, brilliant, strict, loving , would give his shirt off his back...There is an example I think of we were one a family picnic once, I of course was being the petulant teen, but there was a man who obviously was down on his luck looking thru the garbage for food. Dad stopped, took the sandwich that he was going to eat and some chips and a drink and walked over and gave them to this man. It was probably the first "meal" he had eaten in days, that stuck with me over the years. I was a troubled teen, did a lot of things I shouldn't have, caused a lot of problems and fights, and almost every single one of them were directed at my father. I poured every ounce of vitriol out that I had on this man, and he NEVER gave up on me. When most parents would have turned and ran, he tried harder and harder. He did everything to give me the opportunities to succeed and when I fell he was the one that offered out a hand. And just so you know he did not just hand things to me, I worked for it, he made me do that, and I respect him that much more for it.
It reminds me of something Mark Twain said "When I was a boy of 14, my father was so ignorant I could hardly stand to have the old man around. But when I got to be 21, I was astonished at how much the old man had learned in seven years."
One other fact..this man remarried to my mother, she left the biggest mistake of her life where the only good thing that came out of it was me. But when she remarried to this man, he adopted me, and from day one he has loved me and treated me as his own. And I am his son. It just goes to show that any fool can be a dad and create a baby, but it takes a real man and a loving caring being to be a father.
Dad I know it was tough growing up I understand what you were doing , and I love you for it.
I love you Dad!

Questions and Misconceptions

I wonder when we are growing up when do we lose that ability to see past what makes people different? I think some people never lose it and others never have it.
I think back to high school art class. I was different in high school...I had issues but then again what kid growing up doesn't. I had friends that crossed all the groups, I knew jocks, nerds, geeks, wastoids, punks, cowboys...all of them. I never had a problem talking to anyone, in fact some people might say I talked too much. My last year was the toughest I think, I had gone thru some pretty bad shakeups and really had a bleak outlook. It was then that I decided to take an art class...I figured easy "A" and would be no work. I was wrong on both counts. It was one of the classes I did the most work in and it was not easy...fun but not easy at all.
Anyway in this class I met a friend named John..John had cerebral palsy and had been confined to a wheel chair his whole life. He was one of the best artists I probably have ever met. He was funny, kind, caring, talented and never ever said anything bad about anyone. We used to talk girls, movies, trade dirty jokes...things all teen boys do. I remember I was having a hard time with a particular project and he helped even though he had a ton of things he had to do himself. That was just the kind of guy he was, in a way it was because of him that when I moved and went to college I enrolled in the art department, always tyring new things visual arts, art with light, different styles of painting, drawing, trying sculpture even though never doing that before. I found I had a passion for it, in fact in my first two years I was in 2 private gallery shows, and in three invitational ones at school. I had found something I loved by accident. but those are always the best accidents in life. You stumble across something you never would have thought of and find not only do you have the passion for it but you have the talent. And I never would have found this if not for that one friend.
John was a good guy and he was ostracized by some because of his disability..he would joke that he was excluding them because they didn't have the guts to hang like he did. He moved past his disability and unlocked the art that went thru his head and tried to give it to the world. I want to thank him for that, but I won't. Not because I don't want to but because I can't.
John died a few years ago, he didn't get to have the family most of us have set out to build. He cared and he loved and like any other guy we knew would try to be the first to point out the hot girl walking by in the hall. To a lot of people who saw him he was someone limited and could not do half of what we could, but me I saw past that and he was limitless, and realise even though he only lived half as long as we did, he lived more life than most of us ever will.

Stormy Weather

Ok so last night was a rough one. Grayson had a really hard time last night, it is part of the whole cycle. He has some days where it seems like nothing in the world is wrong, but there are other days where for one reason or another things seem to take that deep, dark spiral down. I feel bad for him when this happens. He gets upset so this exacerbates his behaviors, which in turn frustrates him, which then make his tics worse, which then makes him angry that he can't stop, and so on and so on. It can really turn into a trip down a long scary hole some nights for him. Sometimes it seems like the smallest thing sets him off, things you and I may take for granted can be the whole world to him at times like this. It's tough on Shauna and I too, we try to handle it as well as we can, it runs you through the whole gambit of emotions...anger, frustration, sadness, fear..etc. As a parent you find yourself sometimes saying to yourself "Is this my fault?". You know it's not anything you did, but those of you that have children know that as a parent you sometimes feel to blame. I am not by any means perfect, some days I handle things better than others, and after nights like this one I always feel like I am looking at myself saying "What could you have done to handle that better?"
I will always know there is room to improve, there is always room for mistakes, but I have to remember no matter what I am there for him and that if I didn't love my son with all my heart I wouldn't be here would I? That's what love is. Love is not always puffy clouds and rainbows. Love is the storms too, love is knowing you will make those mistakes but there is someone there who will help you pick up and dust off.
I have had people ask me do you regret having Grayson since he has all those problems. I kind of look at them wondering if I actually heard this right. I would never regret having him, I feel bad sometimes for him that he has all these problems, but never once no matter how bad it gets, or how upset I get, would I ever wish I hadn't been down this road. Until you have a child, you just can not understand the depths you would go to.

Shocked by the STUPIDITY

OK I know it has been a few days, but there is an issue that I have been sitting on. Its one of those things where I am trying to take the advice that my grandfather gave me years ago. "If something makes you mad and you are going to put it in writing, write it out, think about it for a few days, and re-read it, then re-write." He was right, I have written this particular entry out about 5 times and have decided that what is going up, and it will make some people mad, and if it does, GOOD!!!! Then I have done my job, this is something more people should be mad about.
There is an unsettling tendency towards complacency, towards intolerance in this country. Yes we have passed more and more laws allowing equal rights for gay couples, as well we should, they deserve every bit of equality as any heterosexual couple. We have passed more and more stricter laws for hate crimes whether they be against someone for their race, creed, sex, or sexual preference. And to this I say it's about damn time. There is one group though that make me ashamed to be an American white male who was brought up in a Christian household. I am talking about Westboro Baptist Church. They are a radical offshoot of the baptist church, in fact they have gone out of the way to make sure people know they are not part of it. It would seem more like the Baptist church would not want to be associated with this group of ill-mannered, ignorant, bigoted people who say they are praising God. OK but I would like to know where god said to protest outside of funerals with slogans like "God hates F**gs" or outside of Temples saying "God hates Jews".
OK let's break this down...first off for those of you out there that are Christian, no matter what sect i.e:Baptist, Methodist, Catholic, Protestant, etc., please answer this question. Where did Jesus of NAZARETH come from? He came from Judea. What race and religion was Jesus? Jewish. Who killed him? ROMANS..it was a matter of politics. Now if Jesus is God's only begotten son who he loved so that he sent him here to die for people's sins, why would God hate Jews? answer: He DOESN'T. God or as some call him Jehovah, or Yahweh...both of which are not words that originate in English folks...think about it, knew he had to send his son down to be persecuted and what would happen. That is the first thing you learn in church.
Here I find myself wondering why this Westboro church thinks they are some god given mission to tell us to hate.
Try this on for size:
"Finally, all of you, have unity of mind, sympathy, brotherly love, a tender heart, and a humble mind. Do not repay evil for evil or reviling for reviling, but on the contrary, bless, for to this you were called, that you may obtain a blessing. For “Whoever desires to love life and see good days, let him keep his tongue from evil and his lips from speaking deceit; let him turn away from evil and do good; let him seek peace and pursue it." 1 Peter 3:8-11
or how about this from the Quran:
" Worship Allah, and do not associate with Him anything, and be good to parents and to kinsmen and orphans and the needy and the close neighbour and the distant neighbour and the companion at your side and the wayfarer.Surely, Allah does not like those who are arrogant, proud.” (4:36)
or this from the Old Testament:
"A friend owes kindness to one in despair..."Job 6:14.
I have read the Torah, the Old and New Testaments, the Book of Mormon, The Quran, The Bhagavad Gita, and in nowhere in them can I find where we are called on humiliating others, scarring them because of their choices, and killing them. In fact every single one of these great religious texts talks of reaching out for those who are troubled, for helping those who do not have as much as other, being tolerant and forgiving.
Even other religions teach this Pagans and Wiccans believe in "first do no harm" . In the practice of Earth powers you learn to use the energies for good of all..evilness will come back onto you if that is what you put out.
So what I want to know where this "church" and I use that term loosely gets off protesting out side the funerals of slain soldiers coming home from overseas and being met with signs that say "God hates f**s" or "You are going to hell" or the favorite of everyone "God hates America". They protest outside of funerals of the families who lost soldiers in Iraq and the Middle East, with signs like this. Telling the children who just lost a mother, father, brother, uncle, etc, that they are going to hell because the army allows gays and so god hates them. I saw video of a man old enough to be my father tell a child who was already crying because her daddy has just died "Your Daddy is burning in Hell, and God hates him". Big man to tear down a little vulnerable girl. I am not one to disallow some one to speak or strike a man, but if this had been my child, needless to say that old man would be in the hospital. This church BRAGS, actually brags how many protests they have done. They show at funerals for murdered hate crime victims, people who have died from aids (whether there were gay or not, because according to them it's God's judgement against gays). They claim it is alright under the First Amendment for free speech.
Since when is hate mongering and wanting to incite rioting, freedom of speech. They bring children to these rallies and have them desecrate the flag. If they want to do this fine but they should not sit here and sue when people and communities say we don't want you here. This church is as bad as the Neo-Nazi Skinheads of the 80'and 90's, or even the National Socialism of the 40's, better known as the Nazi movement of Germany.
I have friends of all races, colors, religions (christian, pagan, wiccan, etc), preferences ( bi, hetero, gay)...to me I see people. I have friends that are Born again, Atheist, Republican, Democrats, conservative, liberal. I know people who say we need to love everyone, and I know people who want us to take the "shoot 'em all and let God sort 'em out" line. But no matter what they believe and how they think I treat them with respect. I don't agree with them all or even all the time, but remember this, they are people, and they feel, they think, they love, they cry, they hurt.
We are all made of the chemicals, chemicals that make up 90% of the universe (so yes even those that say we are made of stars are right in a way), it is what we teach our fellows and children that make up who and what we are as a world.
So I pose one last question to you:
Do you want a world posed to our children where we attempt to live with each other and help each other out? or do you prefer the world where a young Daughter just celebrated her 5 year old birthday party last month and this month is burying her daddy while someone from some "church" she has never heard of spits on her and tells her that "daddy is in hell"?
Think about it, it is not enough to sit on the couch and watch these atrocities unfold and we look on saying, "oh my, oh dear". No we need to make sure we let our officials know this type of behavior will not be tolerated in our area. If they come, get your neighbors to hold tarps up in front of them to block them from the sight of the families, get friends with loud cars and motorcycles to park outside the pulpit area and when the sermon of hate is being given, rev those engines, blast and thump that bass to drown out the hate. Violence is not needed, and neither are the hatemongers. We can show them in a peaceful, non violent way, they are not needed or wanted.

YOUR UNFRIENDLY DRUGSTORE

OK I have a question . We all know Pharmaceutical companies are the big evil. They will wallow in their filth demanding the American consumer bow down and suckle at teat of their poison. Drink the kool aid as it were. OOOOh you say we have been promised health care...sure but you people must realise this is not a right now thing. Here is a breakdown as to what I sacrifice to pharmaceutical gods everymonth:
for my son:beteween his ADHD med, Mood Leveler, and anti Tic med, not to mention his thyroid med and the various supplements..his meds run over 200.00/month
for Shauna: medicine for her Soriatic arthritis, which makes her deathly ill for a couple of day not not to mention her meds to help things level for her...150.00/month
my meds:compared to thiers almost non existing..until you get my battery of bloodpressure meds and beta blockers to try and keep me from having a another stroke ( I have actually had two)...but there are months I go without so Shauna and Grayson can have what they need to live a normal life, We all know that with technology many of these meds can be made much cheaper however some of the biggest lobbyist out there push push and push to get the favoritism (i.e.dinners, good company, etc).
I mean it is because of this that when I order my son's asthma med I have two options. Get the one that when he uses it will exacerbate the adhd and bounce him off the walls for hours. the other option is a sister drug that shows to have less effect of that sort. This is the sore spot...the one that really messes him up is super cheap, but I am going to pay more so I can use the one that will work less adverse to him, because the drug companies hold my insurance hostage.
Here's the rub..many many many many of the drugs out nowadays could be made readily available for everyone..not just the few . Except the drug companies scream "what about us"...they have the money for research, its the kings in the tops of those ivory towers who are throwing banquets and sending money off-shore, and taking decadent vacations is what is driving the price. I don't like to wish ill on people but if only one of them had to go thru the struggle to pay some meds and put off others so your family could survive things would change.
And people are wondering why American citizens are going to Europe, Canada, and Mexico for meds...this is why. So not to pay out too much, why do our citizens need to leave to do this? When the same prices and availability should be there. We are going to advertise this country as to how advanced and ahead of it all we are...lets live up to it! DO IT, DO IT NOW
Fix this! Fix it at home! Fix it now!

That Still Small Voice

When my son comes to me and wonders because he has seen atrocities on the History Channel and I explain that yes the world does have truly people like this out there. "I don't get it daddy, what did those people in those camps do to him". Having to explain how some people abuse their power and destroy people for personal, unbalanced reasons is hard. Explaining that they thought these people were lesser people because they were different, or fell outside their feelings of what was the norm, when they were just people is all.
I explained this was a horrible tragedy over 60 years ago. He asked if stuff like still happens. ...I will not lie and explained that yes..I explained Sarajevo, Bosnia, Somalia, Kenya,etc....it tore my heart to have me be the one to explain these things and watch just a small sparkle in his eyes grow a little dimmer..
Sometimes I wish that everyone could see the world through the eyes of a child. Children are not born hating. This is a lesson that is taught by the world, a lesson that too many of us learn all to well. I have always found it odd that one person can look at another and make up their mind as to who this person is and what kind of person they are by just the color of their skin, the accent they speak with, the clothes that they wear, to me this is the epitome of stupidity.
I explained to my son there are beautiful things in this world and if things upset you listen to that still small voice, and find the good that you can do to make it better. Everyone you meet you affect..good or bad...long or short..remember that you should appreciate the good you can do AND THAT YOU CAN CREATE A BETTER PLACE.

Man's cruelty to man

I've learned a few things over the years. No matter how good you are there will ALWAYS be someone better. No matter how smart, someone smarter. So when I listen to those people who tell you exactly how it is going to be and close themselves off to anything new I shake my head.
People can be cruel, ignorant, bigoted, close minded, and down right mean. However people can be loving, intelligent, accepting, open to new things, and willing to help. The ability to love and care is what sets us above other creatures, as does the ability to hate and be cruel. Mark Twain said. "Of all the animals, man is the only one that is cruel. He is the only one that inflicts pain for the pleasure of doing it"- excerpt "The Lowest Animal.
I grew up an in area of Texas that catered to those of us that lived on fringe, the musicians, the punks, etc. yet even there we had those that would beat you to within an inch of you life simply because you were of a different color, dated someone of a different color, or associated with someone of a different color. This was man's cruelty to man for no other reason than they weren't the same. I spent years trying to teach people that was not the way to think of others. Why is it OK to be cruel just because someone is different? the answer: IT'S NOT.
Many of you have read my letter to my son. He has many friends but their are those when they are just with him they are his best friend. However, some other people come around and he is anathema. I know it bothers him...but he just looks at me and says "I understand Dad it's peer pressure and some kids can't stand up to it, but they will come back around and be my friend later again."
I was proud of this insight..one thing I have tried to instill in him is to be your own person. Don't waste time waiting for others to say " oh wow that's cool", only worry about it if you can say that to yourself and you know you are doing the right thing. Doing that and being your own person will take you farther into this life than anything else.

A letter

Dear Congress,
Please remember that your small group speaks for a larger mass. Please remember that you have a greater duty to work for us, you are in essence an employee of the American people. Please remember that not everyone is Catholic, Protestant, Baptist, Methodist, etc. Please remember that many people in this great country are not even Christian. Please remember you have a responsibility to make your decisions not based on religion but on law and the wants of the people, in case you have forgotten we do have separation of church and state, which is as follows:That government and religious institutions are to be kept separate and independent from each other. Rather simple in the instructions I believe, so please remember this the next time you are posturing for the public, yelling explicatives, or disrespecting each other. Please also remember that just as you were hired for this job, you can be fired.
Sincerely,
Your Boss the American Public

Math and Poetry

This is in response to those who say math and literature have nothing in common..that they are regulated to right brain and left brain people..here is proof they CAN and do meet.........
Thisis the ship of pearl, which, poets feign,
Sail the unshadowed main,–
The venturous bark that flings
On the sweet summer wind its purpled wings...
In gulfs enchanted, where the Siren sings
,And coral reefs lie bare,
Where the cold sea-maids rise to sun their streaming hair.
Its webs of living gauze no more unfurl;
Wrecked is the ship of pearl!
And every chambered cell,
Where its dim dreaming life was wont to dwell,
As the frail tenant shaped his growing shell,
Before thee lies revealed,–
Its irised ceiling rent, its sunless crypt unsealed!
Year after year beheld the silent toil
That spread his lustrous coil;
Still, as the spiral grew,
He left the past year’s dwelling for the new,
Stole with soft step its shining archway through
,Built up its idle door,
Stretched in his last-found home, and knew the old no more.
Thanks for the heavenly message brought by thee,
Child of the wandering sea,
Cast from her lap, forlorn!
From thy dead lips a clearer note is born
Than ever Triton blew from wreathed horn;
While on mine ear it rings,
Through the deep caves of thought I hear a voice that sings:
–Build thee more stately mansions, O my soul,
As the swift seasons roll!
Leave thy low-vaulted past!
Let each new temple, nobler than the last,
Shut thee from heaven with a dome more vast,
Till thou at length art free,
Leaving thine outgrown shell by life’s unresting sea! -"The Chambered Nautilus"Oliver Wendell Holmes

My son My life

For those of you that don't know I have a 12 year old son. He is bright, vivacious and laughs. But he worries, frets, gets upset and cries. My son has severe ADHD a neurological disorder that affects his ability to concentrate and react "normally" according to some people in social situations, not to mention that he has to have a routine that almost borders on OCD to help keep him grounded. Now take this and add O.D.D.- Oppositional Defiance Disorder..long story short on this one it makes him without thinking about it defy when he is asked to do some thing. YES YES YES I know this is a gross over simplification of the situation but there it is. Now for the triple play lets add a tic disorder that will qualify him as having touorette's. And no he does no yell out obscenities..not every case does that. Finally for the icing on the cake let throw in a dash of thyroid problems that might morph into Hashimoto's (an auto immune disease that causes you white blood cells to attack you body) when he gets older, but for now it is content with keeping him small in stature for his age.
He is a wonderful boy 12years old going on 20 it seems sometimes, wonderfully smart for his age. Spends most of his school week being teased by other kids...but he still tries to make sure he helps others that are not as fortunate as him and wants to work with Special Ed kids when he grows up.
He wants a dog for his birthday...but he wants to rescue a dog from the pound, wants to get one from the infamous "kill zone" in town to save it.
I love him more than anything else and sometimes I feel like I do not deserve this very special child. Whatever forces combined to send this child into my life...I thank you.
I love you Grayson

Stem cell and you

I am going to take a stand that some people will like and many others will hate. I think that America is STUPID when it comes to stem cell research. The religious "right" argues and attempts to brainwash the masses that the only way to get stem cells is from aborted fetuses. That is ill-educated, ignorant, stupidity to the max. There are ways to get it with out killing, granted the most know way is to create a fertilized embryo and harvest from there, but did you know that it can be taken from umbilical blood or even bone marrow. There may be other ways out there but at every single step we are blocked from researching those as it is deemed a crime against god. Here is a thought for those out there who argue we are created in His image...if that is the case would he not be considered the SMARTEST being alive...therefore if we are in his image we should strive to be just as smart. Many scientists believe it is from Him that they are blessed with the foresight to do their research, that it is His way of guiding them. If scientific research was so evil would he not stop it and certainly if it was as evil as some of these Televangelist would have us believe would he not get "biblical" and start turning people into pillars of salt? What is so evil in finding ways to fix thyroid diseases, fibromyalgia, cystic fibrosis, or even Cancer? Stem cells would go a long way into being able to ensure that the organ donor doesn't die a year after a "life saving" transplant because the body starts to reject the organs. I for one speak from the viewpoint of a parent of a child who would benefit from this type of research, and I am ashamed to say I live in this country. I am ashamed I say I live in a country that has as one of its main tenets "separation of god and state", but it never fails that policy is written because of someone spouting on how they talked to god and "he don't like it one bit". Everyone is entitled to their opinions but get educated. Stem cell is not about killing babies, and in fact there is research out there showing that we are able to use virus and a skin cell or neuron to create stem cells...let's wake up..fund this...and quit throwing away needlessly some of our best minds, and minds that could have unlimited options but will never know due to THE U.S. of A stopping research